u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
