dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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