i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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