It's Friday. Sex?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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