At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
