He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Randomize
