There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
