I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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