well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
not ubering you a puppy
Can you repeat that, but with context?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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