nutella sex= disaster
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
That accounts for only three of the penises
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
