Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Randomize
