I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
