btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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