so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
