I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize