Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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