WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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