I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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