please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
