Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
