She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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