no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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