I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
