before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
even my farts smell like vagina
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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