that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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