butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
