Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
