hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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