Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
