and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
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