I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
