woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
