it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Randomize