Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize