I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
