I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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