TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm passing your future prison.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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