it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
