OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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