i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
