i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
