he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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