You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
