If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
