Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
