We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Let's get the cat blown out
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize
