I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
