i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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