I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
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