Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
